Santa Claus is currently receiving a controversial COVID-19 treatment that contains, among other ethically sensitive things, 450 children's souls.

Santa Claus Being Treated for COVID with Treatment Including Souls of Children

NORTH POLE – After testing positive for COVID-19, Santa Claus has been receiving a controversial new treatment that includes the souls of 450 children, among other ingredients, to help Claus recover from the deadly disease.


President Trump has been hiding from his staff and White House security since losing the Presidential election last month.

Trump Hiding from Staff in White House

WASHINGTON, DC – After losing the Presidential election, by a considerable margin, Donald Trump has begun hiding from staff in the White House in a desperate attempt to remain President.


Beth Sinclair: COVID-19 Thanksgiving Tips

Hello, hello, HELLOOOOOOOO! Oh. My. GOD. It has been forever! It is I, your bestest friend in all of the deep, dark web – Beth Sinclair!


Qanon Revealed to be Mountain Dew Marketing Campaign

WASHINGTON, D.C. – In a shocking Post-Election revelation, the source of the mysterious Qanon conspiracy theory has been revealed to be the marketing team for the soft drink Mountain Dew.


President Trump has locked himself in a White House bunker after screaming that he has seen a ghost.

Trump Refuses to Come Out of Bunker After Seeing Ghost

WASHINGTON, D.C. – According to multiple sources within the White House, President Trump has been hiding in a bunker since Halloween after he reported seeing “a ghost.”


Local Man Unable to Help Girlfriend Enjoy Jazz

SEATTLE, WA – After months of trying, local Jazz enthusiast Dereck Shoemaker has been unable to convince his girlfriend that listening to jazz music is enjoyable.


Lisa Huller is considering several different excuses for not voting for Biden.

White, Suburban Woman Still Considering Excuses to Not Vote for Biden

LANSING, MI – Local white, suburban, mother, Lisa Huller, is still considering several different excuses to not vote for the Democratic Presidential nominee Joe Biden.


Baby Yoda Apologizes for Past, Controversial Tweets

HOLLYWOOD, CA – Baby Yoda is facing backlash and condemnation for a serious of controversial tweets the actor made in 2014 regarding suspected sex offender Jeffrey Epstein.


President Trump stands outside a White House entrance, unable to enter due to the stick he carries being longer than the width of the doorway.

Frustrated Trump Unable to Bring Long Stick into White House

WASHINGTON, D.C. – President Donald Trump has been stuck outside the White House for several hours as he tries to enter the building carrying a long stick.


Experts Offer Tips to Keep School Kids Covid-19 Free

ATLANTA, GA – As children across the country return to school concerns of exposure to and spread of COVID-19 have parents worried about their family’s safety.


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