Amazon will give each warehouse worker an extra diaper this holiday season.

Amazon Warehouse Workers to Get Extra Diaper as Holiday Bonus

BELLEVUE, WA – Amazon warehouse workers across the country will be receiving a special bonus this holiday season in the form of one extra adult diaper.


Hot, New Restaurant Only Serves Crusts Cut from Children’s Sandwiches

SAN FRANCISCO, CA – The Bay Area’s hottest new restaurant is making a name for itself in both menu and sustainability by offering only crusts cut from local children’s sandwiches.


The Congress.gov website still has several politicians that are available to be purchased.

Lotto Winner Planning to Buy Politician

TOLEDO, OH – The winner of the recent Mega Millions lottery jackpot said she plans to purchase her very own politician with the winnings.


A group gathered at a local bar was surprised to learn that MTV is still on the air.

Group Shocked to Learn MTV Still on The Air

NEW YORK, NY – A mixed group of Millennials and Gen-Xers were shocked this week to learn that MTV is still on the air and broadcasting new content.


Newspaper's 900th Story Doesn't Live Up to Hype

PORTLAND, OR – The much anticipated and celebrated 900th story published by online satirical magazine The Scoop News, failed to make any positive impressions and left readers across the world concerned about the future of the newspaper


God said he will no longer leave his children in charge when he takes a vacation.

God Apologizes for Leaving His Kids in Charge Last Seven Years

HEAVEN – After returning from vacation and seeing the state of Earth, God has promised to never again put his kids in charge while he is away.


Brooks Brothers new line of work from home clothing will offer customers comfort and easy access to genitals.

Brooks Brothers Releases New Work From Home Line

NEW YORK, NY – Brooks Brothers has unveiled a new line of clothes designed for men who work from home but still want to present themselves as professional on video conference calls.


Santa Claus Will Not Accept Lists Containing Ivermectin

NORTH POLE – Santa Claus has announced that he will no longer accept children’s Christmas lists that contain Ivermectin, hydroxychloroquine, or Z-pack.


Former punk band guitarist, Gavin Lewis, wishes he had sold out years ago when given the chance.

Old Punk Guitarist Really Wishes He Sold Out

BALTIMORE, MD – The former guitarist of a punk band has admitted that he wishes he had sold out when given the opportunity years ago.


Senators Joe Manchin and Kyrsten Sinema have proposed taxing Minecraft players instead of billionaires to pay for the infrastructure bill.

Manchin and Sinema Propose Taxing Minecraft Players to Pay for Infrastructure Bill

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Senators Joe Manchin and Kyrsten Sinema have proposed changes to the funding of the infrastructure bill.


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