God said he will no longer leave his children in charge when he takes a vacation.

God Apologizes for Leaving His Kids in Charge Last Seven Years

HEAVEN – After returning from vacation and seeing the state of Earth, God has promised to never again put his kids in charge while he is away.


Local man Glenn Ramirez has made a New Year's Resolution to finish the puzzle he started in 2019.

Local Man Makes New Year's Resolution to Finally Finish Puzzle

HOUSTON, TX – For his New Year’s Resolution, local Man Glenn Ramirez has committed to finishing the jigsaw puzzle he started in 2019.


Senators Joe Manchin and Kyrsten Sinema have proposed taxing Minecraft players instead of billionaires to pay for the infrastructure bill.

Manchin and Sinema Propose Taxing Minecraft Players to Pay for Infrastructure Bill

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Senators Joe Manchin and Kyrsten Sinema have proposed changes to the funding of the infrastructure bill.


Derrick Browdirt has been unable to communicate with his friends and family since the cancellation of sports.

Local Man Unable To Communicate Without Sports

DALLAS, TX – A local sports fan, Derrick Browdirt, has found himself unable to communicate with other males due to the cancellation of all sports and sporting events during the COVID-19 pandemic.


Teen Still Waiting for a View on His Fornite Video

GOLDEN, CO – A local teen has been waiting for several hours for his YouTube post to register a view.


After being confused for decades, President Trump has officially changed Link's name to Zelda in the popular video game series The Legend of Zelda.

Trump Signs Executive Order Changing Link’s Name to Zelda

WASHINGTON, DC – President Donald Trump signed an executive order this week renaming the central character in The Legends of Zelda video game.


For the first time in three years, 15-year-old Rachelle Bremerton has completed a full, complete sentence.

Local Teen Completes First Full Sentence in Three Years

UPLAND, CA -In what doctors are reporting as a medical breakthrough, 15-year-old Rachelle Bremerton has said a complete sentence for the first time in three years.


Star Wars Rocks and Sticks is this year's hottest toy.

Toy Magazine Releases 2015’s List of Hottest Toys

NEW YORK, NY – Toy Aficionado magazine has released its annual “Best toys” list to aide parents looking for the best and hottest toys this holiday season. The list features a number of new toys as well as a couple “old favorites.”

“This season is all about Star Wars,” said Toy Aficionado magazine Senior Editor Hal Sweera. “Star Wars has put its name on just about everything. And while the action figures and Lego sets may get a lot of attention, but the best Star War toy is actually the Rocks and Sticks set.”


Having difficulty attracting new recruits, ISIS is working with an American marketing team to rebrand itself.

ISIS Hires Marketing Firm to Help Soften Image

DAMASCUS, SYRIA – After suffering a series of recent defeats, the terrorist organization known as Islamic State of Iraq and Syria (ISIS) is looking to re-brand its image in hopes of bringing in new recruits.

According to senior ISIS leaders, recruitment of new members has slowed as the population of men between the ages of 16 and 25 has been depleted.


Local Teen to “Take A Year Off” After High School

WAYNESVILLE, IN – Local high school student, Roy Garfield, told his family that after graduation he will not be going to college in the fall and that he plans on just “taking a year off and just relaxing.”


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