Coffee Shop Customer Sad to Learn Other Coffee Shop Customer is Not Gay

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BEAVERTON, OR – A regular at JavaTown café was saddened to learn that another regular customer is not gay.

Over the past several months Jassie Nardly, 24, has had brief interactions with Jonah Montgomery, 21, and based on those interactions Nardly thought Montgomery was gay.

“I would see (Montgomery) at the coffee shop all the time and we would say ‘hi’ to each other and, you know, do like, some small talk,” said Nardly. “The way that he looked, I mean the way he dressed and the way he sat and the fact that he wasn’t checking out all the other girls in the café… I guess I just thought he was gay. And it was really cool to have, like, a gay café buddy but now I know that he’s not gay and that sucks ‘cus now he’s just some guy in a café. Ugh.”

During a recent interaction Montgomery asked if Nardly would be interested in joining him for dinner at which point Nardly became disheartened and asked “but aren’t you gay?”

“She was totally shocked and bummed when I told her I wasn’t gay,” said Montgomery. “I get it but I guess I didn’t realize she thought I was gay. Too bad, she was really nice and I enjoyed talking to her. Maybe I should put a little sign on my table that says something like ‘F.Y.I. I’m not gay’ so it doesn’t happen again but I wouldn’t want people to take it the wrong way.”

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