NHL to Cover Every Available Surface in Advertisements
Published January 2024TORONTO, CANADA – The NHL announced that starting next year advertising will be added to every available spot on the ice, boards, and uniforms.
Researchers Identify Hormone Causing Men to Post Idiotic Thoughts Online
Published January 2024GAINESVILLE, FL – Researchers at the University of Florida say they have made a breakthrough in the search to understand why white men are compelled to post their thoughts online after they turn 18.
Local Man Spends Holiday Parties Explaining When He Purchased His Tesla
Published January 2024SEATTLE, WA – A local Tesla owner, Mike Velenski, spent a large portion of recent holiday parties explaining to family and coworkers that he purchased the vehicle before finding out Elon Musk is a complete dipshit.
Coworker Ready To Talk About Israel-Hamas War at Office Holiday Party
Published December 2023LINCOLN, NE – Local man, Dean Jeffries, is looking forward to sharing his thoughts and views on the Israel-Hamas war with his coworkers at the upcoming office holiday party.
Santa Co. Announces Elf, Reindeer Layoffs
Published December 2023NORTH POLE – Santa Co. has announced that it will be laying off 30% of its workforce to reduce costs in the wake of rising labor and material costs.
Fender Releasing New Guitar Designed to Sit in the Background of Video Conference Calls
Published August 2023FULLERTON, CA – Guitar manufacturer Fender will be releasing a new line of guitars designed specifically to sit in the corner of a room during video conference calls.
Studios Give Hollywood Writers New List of Demands
Published August 2023LOS ANGELES, CA – As the writer’s strike in Hollywood continues, the studios have offered a new list of proposals as a path forward to finally ending the strike.
Taco Bell Adds New Menu Item El Wado
Published July 2023IRVINE, CA – Taco Bell will be rolling out a new menu item this month consisting of a handful of meat, cheese, and lettuce rolled into a ball. Taco Bell “chefs” are calling the new creation El Wado.
New Summer Fashion Tips for 2023
Published March 2023LOS ANGELES, CA – This summer’s fashion trends are beginning to hit store shelves and to help guide readers to make the best choices, The Scoop News has asked several leading fashion industry experts to weigh in on the hottest summer styles.
Colombia Opens Ski Resort Using Cocaine Instead of Snow
Published February 2023BOGOTA, COLOMBIA – In an effort to draw tourists to the country, Columbia will open it’s first ski resort featuring cocaine rather than snow.