Nike Releases New Air Pump Face Mask

PORTLAND, OR – As several states now require people to wear masks to slow the spread of COVID-19, Nike is set to release a new Nike Air Face Mask that will utilize air pump technology to contour the mask to the wearer’s face.


White House Intern, Jordan Fisher will take over as head of the CDC later this month.

Trump Names Intern Who Helped Remove Computer Virus Head of CDC

WASHINGTON, D.C. – President Trump has installed a new head of his COVID task force – a White House Intern that helped remove a computer virus from the President’s laptop.


Trump has been seen pressing his mouth and tongue to the White House windows on several occasions.

White House Staffer Fired for Telling Trump to Stop Licking Window

WASHINGTON, D.C. – A White House staffer has been fired for suggesting President Donald Trump stop licking and “doing blowfishes” on the White House windows.


Brock Winsom, who played Physician By the Door, in an episode of the television show “M.A.S.H.” in 1975 is eager start treating patients.

Actors Who've Played Doctors or Nurses Called To Help with Treating COVID-19 Patients

NEW YORK, NY – Facing an overworked healthcare system due to the COVID-19 pandemic, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention is calling on any actor or actress that has ever appeared in a movie, TV show, or play as a medical professional to report to their closest hospital to treat patients.


Derrick Browdirt has been unable to communicate with his friends and family since the cancellation of sports.

Local Man Unable To Communicate Without Sports

DALLAS, TX – A local sports fan, Derrick Browdirt, has found himself unable to communicate with other males due to the cancellation of all sports and sporting events during the COVID-19 pandemic.


Avon will be releasing a new face cream called Crem De La BlaqueFace that the company says will moisturize and protect the face and it's not racist.

Avon Releasing New BlaqueFace Face Cream

LONDON, ENGLAND – Avon Products will be launching a new line of daily use face creams, called Crem De La BlaqueFace next month.


A drink cup made from fried chicken will soon be available at KFCs nationwide.

KFC Unveils New Drink Cup Made from Chicken

LOUISVILLE, KY – Fast food chain KFC has announced plans to release a new beverage cup made from fried chicken.


A recent photo of Truffles the bear who has lost 250 pounds after being diagnosed with diabetes.

Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory Spokesbear Diagnosed with Diabetes

DURANGO, CO – The Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory spokesbear, Truffles, has announced that she has been diagnosed with diabetes due to a decades-long diet comprised almost exclusively of chocolate.


Five Ways to Tell If You Are Addicted to Your Phone

SAN FRANCISCO, CA – As smartphones have become an increasingly important part of our lives some experts are growing concerned we may be developing an addicted to our phones.


Experts Offer Up Ten Ways to be a Happier Person

DETROIT, MI – According to a recent report by the World Health Organization, most of the America’s population describes themselves as unhappy.


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