CHICAGO, IL – Taking a cue from the recent barrage of lawsuits against tobacco companies, Gary Brown, 47, has filed a lawsuit of his own against a company he feels has deceived him.

SCANTON, NC – Religious tensions between Catholic and Baptist organizations have ignited into an all out war this week as a struggle for boycotting rights consumes this nation. At the heart of this strife is a single company so despised, so hated, so not good that the simple mention of its name brings some to outrage, others to kill. That harbinger of doom and despair is Disney.

BOSTON, MA – It seems that when tragedy strikes, it usually hits the way the Mob does, slow and painful, like a gun shot up the rectum. This week, the nation mourns the death of yet another Kennedy family member. Milton C. Winestien-Kennedy has died at the age of 48. A wife, Bunny Winestien-Kennedy, and two children, son Harvey and daughter Allia survive him.

ANAHIEM, CA – Civil unrest has torn apart the once quiet, once peaceful land of It’s A Small World. This tiny little province in the north most sector of Disneyland has erupted in senseless and inescapable violence.

FLAGSTAFF, ARIZ. – A new study just released from Northern Arizona University reveals that repeatedly hitting oneself on the head with a heavy, solid object may in fact be harmful to ones health.

MARTINVILLE, UT – It was a shocking move that racked the once quiet city of Martinville. A decision ending one career and beginning another.

MEXICO CITY, MEXICO – Earlier this week, a representative from the Mexican Government stunned the world with his announcement of Mexico’s plan to compete with the U.S. and Russia in space exploration.
The announcement, held outside of the Presidential palace, held about it a aura of joy and wonder.
“We feel that it is time that our attention was turned to the skies,” Juan Sanchez, Special Aid to the President, said.