Woman Colludes with Russians to Ruin Ex-Boyfriends Birthday

CONWAY, AR – A local woman has been arrested for allegedly conspiring with Russian agents to ruin her ex-boyfriend’s birthday.


Dress Code Forces Man to Dress like an Adult

KANSAS CITY, KS – A newly implemented dress code has forced local developer Curt Dressop to dress like an adult.


Local Bag Boy is a Total Rebel, Doesn’t Care about Anything

BOISE, ID – A bag boy at a local Fred Myers grocery store stated that he is a “rebel” and he doesn’t “care about nothing, especially work.”


Kingston Medical Supply remain unsure what to say and how to act after hearing coworker sneeze and fart at the same time.

Office in Awkward Silence After Coworker Sneezes, Farts

AUSTIN, TX – An awkward silence has persisted in the Kingston Medical Supply office after an employee sneezed and farted at the same time.


President Donald Trump said we will reach out to Mordor in hopes of scheduling diplomatic talks.

Trump Scheduling Diplomatic Talks with Modor

WASHINGTON, DC – During a joint press conference with the President of Argentina, Mauricio Macri, President Trump said he would like to open negotiations with the fictional country of Mordor.
Although Mordor is a fictional land from the popular book series Lord of the Rings, Trump said that he would be reaching out to the country’s leader to set up some “face-to-face time.”


Trump recently finished coloring a picture of the flag of the United States of America.

Trump Finishes Coloring American Flag Picture

WASHINGTON, DC – After working on it for a year and a half, President Donald Trump has finished coloring the first page of his Presidential Coloring book.


A commercial for a male enhancement drug featuring a black actor frightened white viewers.

Black Man in TV Commercial Results in 270 Calls to 911

NASHVILLE, TN – The appearance of a black man in a television commercial frightened white viewers and resulted in more than 270 calls to police.


Random Tweets Reported as Actual News

NEW YORK, NY – Following current industry standards The Scoop News editorial staff have selected random tweets to report as actual news, instead of working, interviewing, and writing about current events.
Due to the overall laziness of journalists, posting tweets as news has become the primary template for most news organizations. For example, here is a tweet where a writer is writing a new book, or perhaps poem about tigers.

Anderson Cooper 360 Host, Panelists Stuck in Infinite Loop

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Panelists and the host of Anderson Cooper 360 on CNN are stuck in an infinite loop as show producers scramble to get the program back on track.


Researchers are studying soccer player's quick recovery from injury.

Researchers Studying Soccer Players’ Injury Recovery

COLUMBUS, OH – Researchers at the Cleveland Clinic are studying soccer players around the world for their unique ability to recover quickly from injury.


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