MINNEAPOLIS, MN – Despite expectations to the contrary, the recent purchase of an Apple iPhone has left Geoffrey Glocke’s life relatively unchanged.

BETHESDA, MD – Insurance lobbyist Larry Branagan is begging Congress to give him what he wants most for Christmas – no public health care option whatsoever under any new health care related legislation.

TUCSON, AZ – According to a recent report released by the White House, the violence in Mexico border towns has reached “Lethal Weapon 3” levels – the highest level of violence seen in Mexico since 1972.

LOS ANGELES, CA – It has been so long since I’ve written a column! Hello, my lovelies, it is I, your ever vigilant reporter of all things that are good, Beth Sinclair!

FLAGSTAFF, AZ – While the Portland Marathon isn’t until next month, local runner, Jassie Hill won’t stop talking about her preparation and training.

LOS ANGELES, CA – As film studios continue the recent trend of remaking classic films, Warner Bros. Pictures announced this week that it will begin production on a remake of the upcoming film “Where the Wild Things Are.”
Although the original film isn’t scheduled for release until next month, Warner Bros. Pictures decided to get a jump on the production of a remake rather than devote resources to developing new story ideas.

SEATTLE, WA – With the enormous success of the video game Rock Band, MTV Games has announced plans to extend the video game line with the addition of at least two news games scheduled to release this yea

LITTLE ROCK, AR – A local father of two, Edgar Glen, has told his family that he doesn’t see what’s so great or funny about The Daily Show with Jon Stewart.

BROOKLYN, NY – In an effort to share resources and save money, Ambulance companies have begun co-operating with Chinese food restaurants.

AUSTIN, TX – In one of the most awkward moments of either of their lives, Deston Laremy and his father, Walt Laremy, discussed sex.