HOLLYWOOD, CA – Just a week after the broadcast of the 73rd Academy Awards, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences has announced big changes for next year’s Oscars ceremony. In an effort to appeal to a younger, hipper crowd, the Academy’s governing board has decided to give not only the Oscar Award itself a makeover, but also drastically change the format of the show and the categories.

GLASGOW, ENGLAND – In a demonstration of his intolerance for imperfection, renowned director Stanley Kubrick returned from the grave this week to “re-do the pile of dog shit that passed for my death scene.”

HOLLYWOOD, CA – Studio executives from Warner Brothers Studios have announced they will adopt a new affirmative action policy on all projects in the future and those currently in production.

HOLLYWOOD, CA – Just in time for the fall season, VH-1 has announced that two new installments of the hit show, “Where Are They Now?” will be premiering before the end of the month. The two shows, which are now in post-production, will center on two of the most beloved acts the world has known, The Backstreet Boys and Britney Spears and the horrible fall from stardom each act took.