Women Panic as Starbucks Pulls Pumpkin Spice Latte
Published September 2015SEATTLE, WA – White women across the country are in a state of panic as Starbucks has announced they will be discontinuing the popular Pumpkin Spice Latte, just weeks before the drink was to go on sale.
California Institutes New Rules for Water Use
Published August 2015SACREMENTO, CA – As the drought continues, the state government of California has issued new laws and policies to conserve water and reduce strain on rivers and aquifers.
North Korea Releases Drone Details, Images
Published September 2015SEOUL, SOUTH KOREA – As tensions between North Korea and South Korea continue to build, North Korea has released details and images of its new drone fleet.
Based on the images released by the North Korea Military, the drones appear to be small helicopters, like those typically sold as toys for children, with guns attached to them by string or duct tape.
Local Man Pulls Life Support From Wife in Pinterest Coma
Published July 2015BISMARCK, ND – After months of debating, soul searching and consulting with family members, local man Dean Weebers has decided to pull his wife, who is in a Pinterest coma, of life support.
Iran Will Honor Nuclear Deal Despite Giggles
Published August 2015TEHRAN, IRAN – The leaders of Iran have told US representatives that the snickers and smirks made by Iran officials during the signing of the nuclear agreement are part of an Iranian custom and not an indication that Iran will not adhere to the agreement.
“No, no, no. The smirk and… giggles as you call them, they were not made because we have no intention of meeting any of these agreements,” said Iran Nuclear Delegate, Masoud Fehrmanni.
Country Artist Wants New Rhyme with America
Published June 2015NASHVILLE – Local country singer Johnny Thunder is reportedly having trouble finding a word that rhymes with America that he hasn’t already used.
Eight Star Wars Rumors that are Probably True
Published March 2015ANAHEIM, CA – The Scoop News has gathered a number of Star Wars experts and identified eight The Force Awakens rumors that are likely to be probably true.
Local Couple Not Overreacting As Much As They Should
Published February 2015SAN CARLOS, CA – A local couple has expressed concern that they may not be overreacting as much as they should compared to everyone else they know.
Travel Magazine Releases List of Top Spring Break Spots
Published February 2015NEW YORK CITY – The travel magazine, Destination Awesome, has released its list of the top five 2015 Spring Break destinations.
Police Officers Agree to Shoot More White People
Published March 2015MEMPHIS, TN – As tensions between police officers and civilians rise across the country, the National Association of Police Organizations (NAPO) is recommending that police officers begin shooting more white people.
“A lot of the tension is racially based, with the perception that police officers shoot minorities more often than white people,” said NAPO spokesman Eddie O’Reilly.