CASPER, WY – A local man told friends and family this week that he is ready to get serious about his bucket list.

HOLLYWOOD, CA – A C-list celebrity has posted a video online of themselves participating in a popular internet meme. In the homemade video, the C-list celebrity acts silly and mugs to the camera while imitating the video that started the meme.

WASHINGTON, DC – After two years of informal classification and diagnosis, the American Psychiatric Association has added a new mental disorder to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders – White Male Panic, or WhiMP.

“Let’s face facts, white men are going crazy, in the clinical sense, all over this country,” said APA President Suzanne Bennett Johnson, PhD.

ORLANDO, FL – Although her family members and friends have tried to explain it, local Grandmother Helen LaFornte doesn’t understand “the Kony thing.”

DALLAS, TX – Bullies across the United States have banded together to call for an end to the call for the end of bullying.

FREDERICK, MD – Last month Treddle signed up for Twitter with the username FuckRogers6969696 and came to regret the decision almost immediately.

WASHINGTON, DC – Earlier this week temporal scientists announced some good news and some bad news today regarding time travel.

WASHINGTON, DC – The Supreme Court is all set to wrap up their judicial year with what many are calling “the case of the century” – Frantz v. Byrne.

The case was brought to the Supreme Course by former Talking Heads drummer Chris Frantz who is suing former Talking Heads lead singer David Byrne. The intent of the suit is to force Byrne to reform Talking Heads so that Frantz, and other former members of the band can “get paid.”

DAMASCUS, SYRIA – As the blood shed continues in Syria, experts on Middle East politics have begun to identify a number of possible reasons for the escalation in violence.

FARGO, ND – In a world where high gas prices are gouging most Americans pocketbooks, one of America’s oldest and proudest professions is struggling to adapt -serial killers.

With gas prices topping five dollars in many states, serial killers are now having to find, kill and bury their victims much closer to home, increasing the risk of being caught by law enforcement.