White, Middle-aged Men Upset with Recent 500 Best Songs List
Published October 2021LOS ANGELES, CA – Middle-aged, white men across the country are expressing their anger with an entertainment magazine’s recent list of the 500 best songs of all time.
Facebook Launches Degree Program to Validate Facebook Users’ Posts, Comments
Published October 2021SAN FRANCISCO, CA – Beginning next month, Facebook will begin offering degree and postgraduate degree programs to Facebook users.
Local Man Still Wearing Fedora For Some Reason
Published August 2021LOS ANGELES, CA – A local Pasadena man is still wearing a fedora hat in publi
Adrian Veidt Admits Plan to Unify Humanity by Releasing COVID-19 has Failed
Published August 2021NEW YORK, NY – Former superhero and the smartest man in the world, Adrian Veidt, also known as Ozymandias, admitted to engineering and releasing the COVID-19 virus in an effort to bring the people of earth together.
New Survey: Most Kids Want to Be an NFT When They Grow Up
Published September 2021CHICAGO, IL – In a new survey of children ages five to 15, a majority of children said they wanted to be an NFT when they grow up.
Internet Group Aims to Help Republicans Find Republican-friendly Rock Music
Published July 2021NASHVILLE, TN – A new online support group has been launched to help Republicans find music made by artists that align with current Republican values.
Olympic Events Changed to Help COVID Affected Athletes
Published August 2021TOKYO, JAPAN – The ongoing COVID-19 pandemic has forced the International Olympic Committee to make several changes to events of this year’s Summer Olympic Games to accommodate athletes COVID-19 related symptoms.
Coworkers Don't Want to Hear About Man's Dungeons and Dragons Game
Published June 2021The coworkers of Ben Magnerson still do not want to hear about Magnerson’s Dungeons and Dragons game.
Teen Wants to Stay in Hotel Room Alone While Family Swims
Published May 2021CORPUS CHRISTI, TX – A teenager on vacation with his family announced that he will just stay in the room, alone, while the rest of the family goes to a hotel pool.
U.S. Sets New Record of COVID Deniers Contracting COVID
Published April 2021WASHINGTON, D.C. – The United States of America set a new COVID record as the number of people who claimed the pandemic was a hoax only to then get infected by COVID rose to over two million.