New Summer Fashion Tips for 2023

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A shirt made of crocs is one of this summer's hottest looks.
A shirt made of crocs is one of this summer's hottest looks.

LOS ANGELES, CA – This summer’s fashion trends are beginning to hit store shelves and to help guide readers to make the best choices, The Scoop News has asked several leading fashion industry experts to weigh in on the hottest summer styles.

Croc clothes
“Crocs used to be just ugly-ass shoes but that’s not the case anymore,” said Editor of Haute Chic Magazine, Merion Bronx. “Now those ugly-ass shoes can be fab new clothes! A hot new line of clothes from the Crocs team features tops and bottoms made from a bunch of Crocs just tied together. The results are a little clunk but very, very now. Trust me, you’ll be seeing this look on many, many celebrities and wannabes throughout the summer. The great thing about this look is that you can even get those weird little charm things that snap into your Crocs so you can really individualize your look.”

Titty Shirts and Booty Shorts
“Every shirt should have a little bit of titty hanging out the bottom. Every. Single. Shirt,” said Fashion Director for Dolce & Gabbana, Burt Beeson. “This summer is all about the drip. And by drip, I mean the whole drip thing but also titties and butts should be drippin’ out the bottom of your clothes. And this is a trend that anyone can utilize. Man boobs? Let’s see the bottoms of those bad boys. And this goes double for the booty shorts boys. Let’s see some ball sack drippin’ out.”

OnlyFans Branding
“Hey, everyone. You know how, just about everyone has an OnlyFans page these days? Since there are so many of us out there we all need to get those subs to get a smash new ride, so we are all gonna need to let everyone know what our OnlyFans channel is,” said fashion influencer, Rebel Yelle. “So make sure whatever you wear this summer is covered with your OnlyFans profile name. Like, see how my shirt here says my OnlyFans profile name, allthestufficanfitinmybutt. I even have it written across my butt because, you know, I put a lot of stuff up there. In my butt I mean.”

Chastity belts
“What’s old is new again. But this time (chastity belts) are out front and in your face,” said Bronx. “This fierce look is going to show the world that you are a freak but also that you know how to lock things up. Chastity belts can be found just about anywhere but this summer we will all be wearing them with literally nothing else. Well, almost nothing else. We will need to wear socks and sandals too but that’s only because we can’t walk around barefoot. Oh my god, can you imagine? But yeah, lots of people are going to be wearing them so you should too.”

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