Random Tweets Reported as Actual News
Published July 2018Due to the overall laziness of journalists, posting tweets as news has become the primary template for most news organizations. For example, here is a tweet where a writer is writing a new book, or perhaps poem about tigers.
Millennials Responsible for Declining Chastity Belt Sales
Published April 2018BOSTON, MA – A sharp decline in the chastity belt industry is being blamed on millennials.
Man Sues for Invitation to 12-Year-Old Girl’s Sleepover
Published February 2018OMAHA, NB – Local man Dean Waters, 27, is suing 10-year-old Lara Schriber for gender discrimination because Waters was not invited to Schriber’s “girls only” sleepover.
Experts Offer Ten Ideas for the Perfect Valentine’s Day
Published January 2018DALLAS, TX – The Valentine’s Day holiday can cause panic and anxiety for those looking for something original, exciting and romantic to do with their loved one.
Decorating For Christmas: Tips from the Professionals
Published November 2017NEW YORK, NY – Decorating for the holidays has become competitive in many neighborhoods across the country regardless of one’s religion.
Trump Confused Why He Can’t Pardon Hamburgler
Published August 2017WASHINGTON, D.C. – President Donald Trump is confused as to why his repeated attempts to pardon The Hamburgler have been met with resistance.
Senate Looking to Pass Health Care Bill Written on Napkin
Published August 2017WASHINGTON, D.C. – Senate Republicans are trying to push through a new heath care bill that was written earlier today on a bar napkin.
Local Man No Longer Feels Comfortable in His Man-Cave
Published April 2017SAN ANTONIO, TX – Local man Jared Waterton says that he is no longer comfortable in his football-themed man-cave.
Newspaper's 700th Story Doesn't Live Up to Hype
Published April 2017PORTLAND, OR – The much anticipated and celebrated 700th story published by online satirical magazine The Scoop News, failed to make any positive impressions and left readers across the world concerned about the future of the newspaper.
Trump had Spinach Stuck in Teeth for Two Weeks
Published March 2017WASHINGTON, D.C. – For more than two weeks, President Donald Trump has had a piece of spinach stuck in his teeth and it remains unclear if he knows that it’s there.