Expert Offers Seven Winter Holiday Costume Ideas

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One fun and easy holiday costume is to dress up as a naughty snowman.
One fun and easy holiday costume is to dress up as a naughty snowman.

LOS ANGELES, CA – With the holiday season upon us, many are still looking for the perfect costume to celebrate this year’s Christmas/kwanza/Hannukah holiday. To assist those still in need of a costume, The Scoop News has surveyed a leading holiday expert and gathered a list of fresh and fun costume ideas.

A naughty candy cane
“Candy is big this time of year and when we are thinking about costumes for this… these? Holiday’s… we dress up during these holidays?” said Costume Designer Davis Kint. “The winter holidays? Have we always done this? It seems like we have but also it kinda seems like we haven’t. I mean, really? Did I just forget all about this? Ok, whatever. Yeah, people love dressing up as Candy Canes, apparently, but this year to make things interesting, go as a ‘naughty’ candy cane. You know, with your boobs and or balls hanging out.”

A naughty snow covered tree
“Everyone loves costumes and everyone just loves that first snow and… no, wait. Seriously. Something seems off here,” said Kint. “I kinda remember dressing up in costumes but also I don’t. It’s hard to explain. I just can’t shake the feeling that something isn’t right. Did I dress up like Santa one year? No, that was my dad before he went to get ‘smokes.’ I don’t know. I can’t… remember.”

A naughty candle
“Oh, is this one of those Mandela Effect things?” said Kint. “You know. where we remember it happening but it never actually happened. Like we dressed up for something but then the winter holidays were something else and somehow that’s all combined in to a weird memory smash-up? It’s probably something like that.”

Jack from the Jack in the Box but… naughty
“Wait… I’m looking through my phone and last year I have a picture of me in a naughty elf costume at this time of year and now I don’t know what to think,” said Kint. “I have no memory of this at all. None. I’m pretty sure I didn’t get that drunk that I’d blackout because I rarely drink to the point of even being drunk but this… this is so weird.”

A naughty tax attorney
“Oh my god. I don’t get it. I specifically remember dressing up in costumes and going out when I was a kid and then when I got older I’d get dressed up in a naughty version of a costume and go out with friends,” said Kint. “I remember that. But I also remember Christmas… or the rest of the winter holidays being something different. It’s so strange.”

A naughty Reindeer
“Did Christmas take over something else?” said Kint. “I also remember these huge family dinners but there was no Santa or Christmas decorations up or like that anything around. It seems silly to say out loud because costumes and huge family dinners are part of the winter holidays but… I feel like that’s not really the case.”

A naughty Jack Frost
“I think I might be going crazy. Do you remember all this as… like, one thing?” said Kint. “Do you remember getting on costumes and having huge dinners and opening presents and… I think I’m in the matrix. Oh shit! I’m in the fuckin’ matrix! Help! Help me! Get me out of here! Neo help me!”

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