I’m here today to give you my picks for the best vacation spots here in the good ol’ US of A.

LOS ANGELES, CA – A new documentary highlighting the danger of babies is causing a series of protests and calls for tighter restrictions on owning a baby.

NEW YORK, NY – Just in time for Mother’s Day, several top designers have come out with new lines of products developed to appeal more to the modern woman.

NEW YORK, NY – The NFL is adopting new rules and working with the NFL Players Association to help players adapt to having an openly gay teammate.

“Our main focus is to make sure everyone is comfortable as we welcome the first openly gay player,” said Eric Winston, President of the NFLPA. “And by ‘everyone’ we mean fans, players, advertisers, coaches, even the cheerleaders. Because, let’s face it, there are some real pieces of shit that play and watch football.”

HOLLYWOOD, CA – With the filming set to begin in a few months, Disney has finally revealed the cast for the highly anticipated Star Wars Episode VII.

NEW YORK CITY – The holiday season is here and parents will soon begin looking for the perfect toys for their children.

As it has done for the past 30 years, The Scoop News has interviewed several toy industry insiders and has compiled a list of toys that are expected to be some of this year’s hottest sellers.

NEW YORK, NY – In order to expedite reporting in the internet age, the Associated Press has approved and released templates to be used for reoccurring stories.

NEW YORK, NY – As Tim Tebow’s NFL career looks to be in jeopardy, one time fan Jesus Christ has begun distancing himself from the football player.

NEW YORK, NY – Shortly after a list of MC Hammer’s 10 best songs that start with the letter ‘K’ was posted on a blog, all entertainment websites announced they would cease operations and shut down.

NEW YORK CITY, NY – Last month the Fox News channel interrupted a series of lies and conjecture to report actual, opinion-free news.

As hurricane Sandy hit the east coast late last month, Fox News broadcaster Jonathan Hunt interrupted a news story about the Obama Administrations plan to destroy the Christian church with real, honest, opinion-free news about the hurricane’s affect on cities.