WASHINGTON, D.C. – White House staffers were both surprised and shocked earlier this week when Trump managed to staple his tie to his desk for the 63rd consecutive day.

LOS ANGELES, CA – It has been 17 years since the question was first raised but investigators and the general public are still unsure who let the dogs out.

VANCOUVER, WA – Workout equipment manufacturer Nautilus has released a new home gym exercise machine that is designed to sit in the garage gathering dust for five years before going up for sale on Craigslist.

LOS ANGELES, CA – Getting children the perfect gift if always the hardest part of any holiday season – especially when there are so many toys and games to choose from. To help parents through this stressful time of the year, The Scoop News has compiled a list of this holiday season’s hottest toys.

SAN DIEGO, CA – A new stroller capable of holding up to five children is about to hit the market and industry experts say it may just revolutionize the stroller industry.

BROOKLYN, NY – It’s been nearly three days since he ate lunch at Ravenwood Tavern, but Tearstin Wilkes says he is close to completing his Yelp review of the restaurant.

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The Pokémon Dewgong, a white sea lion like creature, has been added to Endangered Species list the by the International Union for Conservation of Nature.

The creature has been hunted to near extinction in recent weeks as a result of the popularity of the Pokémon Go game.

“In a lot of ways Pokémon Go has been the worst thing to happen to this world but it has been specifically terrible to the poor little Dewgong,” said Pokémon scientist Kellie Peters.

RAPID CITY, SD – During a press conference at the Ramada Inn and Suites, God clarified some misconceptions about his involvement in recent accidents and recoveries.

NEW YORK, NY – There is a new city at the top of this year’s The Scoop News’ semi-annual list of best places to live although it may not come as a surprise to the people who live there.

AUSTIN, TX – Occasional film viewer Kevin Mothma has proved his intelligence and sophistication by disliking the new film Star Wars: The Force Awakens.

“(Star Wars) The Force Awakens is shallow,” said Mothma. “The story is so pedestrian. There was nothing there. Just a bunch of loosely tied together action scenes. And the main girl in the movie, whatever her name is, was such a Mary Sue.”