To attract vampires and organ harvesters, Tinder will expand user profiles to include blood type and organ heath.

Tinder Expanding User Profiles to Include Blood Type and Organ Health

LOS ANGELES, CA – The popular dating app Tinder is planning on expanding to a new market by allowing users to list their blood type and organ health within the app.


Northern Arizona University will offer a new degree program to teach students about making, maintaining, and pairings of meth.

University to Offer New Meth Sommelier Degree

FLAGSTAFF, AZ– Northern Arizona University (NAU) has announced a new degree program which it hopes will attract new students – Meth Sommelier.


Soon it will be illegal to remove truck nuts from trucks in Texas.

New Texas Law Makes It Illegal to Remove Truck Nuts from Trucks

AUSTIN, TX – The Texas State Legislature has passed a new law making it illegal to remove truck nuts from a truck.


Phillip Staal is still waiting for everyone that received the COVID vaccine to die so he can be right about his conspiracy theory.

Local Conspiracy Theorist Still Waiting to be Right About COVID Vaccine

COLORADO SPRINGS, CO – Local conspiracy theorist says he is patiently waiting to be correct about the COVID vaccine killing millions.


Investigative reporters have discovered JD Vance is an AI generated person.

JD Vance Discovered to be AI Generated

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Republican Vice Presidential candidate J.D. Vance has been revealed to be an artificial intelligence generated person.


Climate scientists have stopped warning people about the dangers of climate change and have started telling people to start working on their bucket lists.

Climate Scientists Now Telling People to Work on Their Bucket Lists

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Many leading climate scientists have decided they will stop warning of pending climate catastrophes and will instead suggest everyone “get to work on their bucket list.”


New Dodge Caravan models will come with French Fries already installed under each car seat.

New Dodge Minivans Will Come with French Fries Already Underneath Seats

DETROIT, MI – Automobile manufacturer Dodge has announced an update to its popular Caravan minivan. Beginning this fall, all new Caravan minivans will come with a French Fry underneath each seat.


An old, white man has expressed nostalgia for a time when he didn't have to hate so many things.

Old, White Man Nostalgic for Time When He Only Had to Hate One Thing

BROOKHAVEN, GA – A local old, white man is feeling nostalgic for a time when he only had to hate one thing instead of almost everything.


Countries will compete in a new Olympic sport by keeping a balloon from touching the ground.

Summer Olympics Adds New Keep Balloon From Hitting the Floor Sport

PARIS, FRANCE – A new sport will be added to this year’s Summer Olympic games – Keep the Balloon Off the Floor, also known as “Balloon Bop.”


According to several vacation experts, Steve’s garage is a great place to spend some time this summer.

15 Amazing Places to Spend a Summer Vacation

LOS ANGELES, CA – As people across the country start planning their summer vacations, The Scoop News has reached out to travel industry experts for a list of this year’s top summer vacation destinations.


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