Local Man Unable To Communicate Without Sports
Published March 2020DALLAS, TX – A local sports fan, Derrick Browdirt, has found himself unable to communicate with other males due to the cancellation of all sports and sporting events during the COVID-19 pandemic.
Texan Testing Canadian's Patience
Published August 2019VANCOUVER, BC – A tourist from Texas is testing a Canadian waiter’s patience and politeness.
Father Unwilling to Accept Son is Terrible at Sports
Published May 2019DALLAS, TX – Local father John Mansinni is slowly coming to terms with the fact that his son, John Jr, is a terrible athlete.
Teppanyaki Chef Halfheartedly Performs for One
Published October 2018DALLAS, TX – A Teppanyaki chef at Texas Japan BBQ Emporium is struggling to perform while preparing food for a table of one.
Local Man No Longer Feels Comfortable in His Man-Cave
Published April 2017SAN ANTONIO, TX – Local man Jared Waterton says that he is no longer comfortable in his football-themed man-cave.
Starbucks Unveils Dick Flavored Coffee Drinks
Published March 2017SEATTLE, WA – Starbucks will be expanding its menu next month, rolling out new dick flavored coffee drinks to stores across the country.
“When looking for a new flavor we asked ourselves ‘what do people, at least most people, like?’ the answer was obvious; dick,” said Starbucks Flavor Engineer, Kylie Kearns. “And the love of dick is worldwide. Almost every single woman has had a dick in their mouth at some point."
“When looking for a new flavor we asked ourselves ‘what do people, at least most people, like?’ the answer was obvious; dick,” said Starbucks Flavor Engineer, Kylie Kearns. “And the love of dick is worldwide. Almost every single woman has had a dick in their mouth at some point."
Scoop List: Top 10 Best Hamburgers in America
Published February 2017The Scoop News has traveled around America tasting every burger in every state, and now we’ve compiled a list of our favorites. Here are The Scoop News’ top 10 burgers in America.
GOP to Deploy Troops, Drones in War on Women
Published November 2014WASHINGTON, DC – After reviewing reports of recent setbacks, Chairman of the Republican National Committee, Reince Priebus, has said he will soon authorize the use of troops and drones in the party’s war on women.
“No single battle has been a catastrophic loss but as these little failures start to pile up… women begin gaining confidence and we simply cannot have that,” said Priebus.
“Jessie” Stars Round Out Star Wars VII Cast
Published February 2014HOLLYWOOD, CA – With the filming set to begin in a few months, Disney has finally revealed the cast for the highly anticipated Star Wars Episode VII.
Boy Ruins Family Vacation for Second Straight Year
Published July 2013TULSA, OK – For the second year in a row, 10-year-old Garrett Jacobs has ruined his family’s summer vacation.
