Scientists Identify Gene Responsible for Making Truck Owners Back into Parking Spots
Published May 2023STANFORD, CA – Researchers at Stanford University have identified the gene responsible for making Pickup Truck owners back in to parking spaces.
God Apologizes for Leaving His Kids in Charge Last Seven Years
Published March 2022HEAVEN – After returning from vacation and seeing the state of Earth, God has promised to never again put his kids in charge while he is away.
Odd Weather Has Old Man Winter’s Friends and Family Concerned He May be Using Drugs
Published November 2021WINTERLAND – Old Man Winter’s family and friends are concerned that his recent erratic behavior may be due to cognitive decline or drug abuse.
New Planet Discovered that Humans Could Totally Ruin
Published August 2020HILO, HI – Astronomers at the W. M. Keck Observatory have discovered a planet capable of supporting life orbiting a nearby star that humans could “definitely ruin.”
New Study by IT Employee Suggests Humans Should Only Work Two Hours a Day
Published June 2019MILWAUKEE, WI – A new study conducted by Jared Weisman, an IT employee at Modera Health Care Solutions, finds humans should only work two hours a day.
Five Ways to Tell If You Are Addicted to Your Phone
Published June 2019SAN FRANCISCO, CA – As smartphones have become an increasingly important part of our lives some experts are growing concerned we may be developing an addicted to our phones.
House Cats Have Begun Stealing Human Souls
Published August 2017BOSTON, MA – House cats have begun stealing human souls as part of the final phase of their plan to conquer Earth.
EPA: Renewable Energy Causes 104,412 Illnesses
Published September 2017“(The EPA) just published a ground breaking report that clearly shows that the renewable energy that the Democrats have been pushing on us for so long is actually the cause of almost every illness that’s out there,” said EPA spokesman Frank Servees.
Zombie Unicorns Attack Fans At Minor League Game
Published September 2011ASHLAND, KY – Three weeks ago fans and professional baseball players were attacked by a herd of Zombie Unicorns as a publicity stunt went horribly wrong.
Retailers Stocking up on Halloween’s Hottest Costumes
Published September 2011LOS ANGELES, CA – With Halloween right around the corner, costume shops all across the country are stocking up on what are anticipated to be this year’s most popular costumes.