TULSA, OK – Local man James Wisuksi says he is “very concerned” about how things are going in New York City despite having never been to New York City and having no relatives or friends in New York City.

SEATTLE, WA – A wealthy, retired, local man thinks someone needs to do something about the homeless issues affecting the city.

SAN FRANCISCO, CA – After months of increasing hate speech on the platform, Twitter has announced it will begin blocking hate speech directed at rich people.

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Senators Joe Manchin and Kyrsten Sinema have proposed changes to the funding of the infrastructure bill.

WASHINGTON, DC – During the State of the Union address last month President Obama made a number of statements reflecting on the past year and made a number of promises looking ahead.

TAMPA, FL –Republican Presidential Nominee Mitt Romney said Thursday that the real reason he has not released his past tax information is because his tax records contain the Anti-Life Equation.

“Believe me, I want to release the information, but if I were to do so, that would pretty much mean the end of life as we know it,” Romney said.

COLUMBUS, OH – Faced with a budget shortfall and a refusal to raise taxes, the Ohio state government voted to sell the state to Google.

With the shortfall estimated at more than three billion, the Ohio state government was faced with limited options to reduce the deficit.

“We thought about everything, except raising taxes,” said president of the Ohio Senate, Tom Niehaus.

LEESBURG, VA – A local homeless man says that he has developed a plan for balancing the budget and addressing all of The United States of America’s current financial concerns.

AUSTIN, TX – A solution to concerns over redistricting and illegal immigration is being proposed by Texas lawmakers to address a recent slew of lawsuits surrounding the 2010 census.

PHOENIX, AZ – While it’s been several months since former President Bush left office, his administration’s immigration plan is starting to come together as Mexican nationals are leaving to return to Mexico.