BROOKHAVEN, GA – A local old, white man is feeling nostalgic for a time when he only had to hate one thing instead of almost everything.

PARIS, FRANCE – A new sport will be added to this year’s Summer Olympic games – Keep the Balloon Off the Floor, also known as “Balloon Bop.”

LOS ANGELES, CA – As people across the country start planning their summer vacations, The Scoop News has reached out to travel industry experts for a list of this year’s top summer vacation destinations.

ALEXANDRIA, VA – The National Rifle Association has sent congratulation cards to all graduating, American high school students congratulating them for making it through school without falling victim to gun violence.

KHARTOUM, SUDAN–The people of Sudan say they are looking forward to the pending influx of free Stanley cups as the popularity of the large travel cups has begun to subside in the United States of America.

WASHINGTON, D.C. –Republicans running for seats in the Senate and House of Representatives have turned to a new website to help in fundraising efforts – GOPnlyFans.

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The United States Food and Drug Administration (FDA) has issued a new rule that requires companies to add a statement on product packaging declaring if the souls of children were used in a product.

DETROIT, MI – After failing to make the first Super Bowl appearance in the team’s history, the Detroit Loins have announced a blockbuster trade – sending wide receiver Josh Reynolds to New York for rapper and singer Nicki Minaj.

HEAVEN – During his annual New Year’s Day address to Earth, God said he is planning to “wrap it up” in 2024.

LINCOLN, NE – Local man, Dean Jeffries, is looking forward to sharing his thoughts and views on the Israel-Hamas war with his coworkers at the upcoming office holiday party.