College Student Has "Sick" Spring Break Plans and Definitely Won't Be Going to his Parent's House
Published February 2024SPOKANE, WA – Gonzaga University freshman Arden Bleamoe told friends that he has “sick” spring break plans and he is definitely not going home to his parent’s house.
Colombia Opens Ski Resort Using Cocaine Instead of Snow
Published February 2023BOGOTA, COLOMBIA – In an effort to draw tourists to the country, Columbia will open it’s first ski resort featuring cocaine rather than snow.
Netflix Announces New Cooking Competition Show “I’d Fuck It”
Published October 2022LOS GATOS, CA –After a string of popular releases, Netflix has announced a new cooking competition show titled “I’d Fuck it.”
Olympic Events Changed to Help COVID Affected Athletes
Published August 2021TOKYO, JAPAN – The ongoing COVID-19 pandemic has forced the International Olympic Committee to make several changes to events of this year’s Summer Olympic Games to accommodate athletes COVID-19 related symptoms.
Super Bowl Halftime Event to Feature White People Doing Whatever They Want
Published January 2021TAMPA, FL – The National Football League (NFL) announced the theme for this year’s Super Bowl halftime show will be “America” and will feature a large number of white people wandering around “doing whatever they want to do.”
Business Owner Pulls Benefits from Employees After Visit by Ghosts
Published November 2019GLENDALE, AZ – After being visited by three ghosts, local businessman Walter Bandict, has announced that he will no longer offer his employees paid time off and medical benefits.
This Year’s Hottest Halloween Costumes
Published October 2019Costa Mesa, CA – Halloween is coming at the end of the month and The Scoop News has reached out to several costume stores across the country to compile a list of this year’s best selling costumes.
God Admits Nation-wide Snow Storm a Result of Not Listening to Prayer Details
Published February 2019DENVER, CO – After recent snowstorms wreaked havoc in cities across the country, God has apologized saying he made the decision to create the winter storms after “half listening to some eight-year-old’s prayer.”
Archaeologists Discover First-Known Dick Pic
Published March 2019SANTIAGO, CHILE – Archaeologists working outside of Santiago have discovered what they believe is the first known instance of a “dick pic.”
Nice Gift at White Elephant Exchange Ruins Party
Published November 2018MEMPHIS, TN – An office Christmas party was ruined when an employee brought an expensive bottle of wine to a white elephant gift exchange.