God Apologizes for Leaving His Kids in Charge Last Seven YearsPublished March 2022
HEAVEN – After returning from vacation and seeing the state of Earth, God has promised to never again put his kids in charge while he is away.
God Releases Statement about CoronavirusPublished May 2020
God Apologizes for High Number of Male CreepsPublished December 2017
HEAVEN – In a statement to the human race, god apologized for an error in his creation model that generated a higher percentage of male creeps than god had intended.
Grandma Still Perfecting Thanksgiving Facebook PostPublished October 2017
SCHAUMBURG, IL – Local grandmother has been sitting at her computer for several hours trying to generate a Thanksgiving inspired Facebook post.
Scoop List: Top 10 Best Hamburgers in AmericaPublished February 2017
The Scoop News has traveled around America tasting every burger in every state, and now we’ve compiled a list of our favorites. Here are The Scoop News’ top 10 burgers in America.
Eating Cute Animals Diet Craze Sweeping NationPublished June 2016
LOS ANGELES, CA – The newest food craze to sweep the Southern California coast is called cutenism which limits diets to eating only animals which are generally regarded as cute.
“Here in SoCal we are cutting edge. We lead the country in new and exciting dietary restrictions,” said nutritionist Gail Lowell. “The gluten-free diet is so two years ago. People want a new dietary restriction that they can use as an excuse.”
The Scoop News' Top Ten Places to LivePublished January 2016
NEW YORK, NY – There is a new city at the top of this year’s The Scoop News’ semi-annual list of best places to live although it may not come as a surprise to the people who live there.
Local Man Pulls Life Support From Wife in Pinterest ComaPublished July 2015
BISMARCK, ND – After months of debating, soul searching and consulting with family members, local man Dean Weebers has decided to pull his wife, who is in a Pinterest coma, of life support.
Blogger Says Obama Wants to Bomb HeavenPublished April 2013
DALLAS, TX – The man behind a popular Conservative news blog has announced he has proof that President Barack Obama is planning to “blow up” Heaven.
Local Grandmother Doesn’t Understand the Kony ThingPublished May 2012
ORLANDO, FL – Although her family members and friends have tried to explain it, local Grandmother Helen LaFornte doesn’t understand “the Kony thing.”