Twitter to Ban Hate Speech Aimed at Rich People

SAN FRANCISCO, CA – After months of increasing hate speech on the platform, Twitter has announced it will begin blocking hate speech directed at rich people.


Marcus Weeksy's classmates have declared him to be the "luckiest boy in the world."

"Luckiest Boy in the World" Celebrates Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanza

COSTA MESA, CA – Classmates have declared local boy the “luckiest boy in the world” for celebrating Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanza.


The map of men orbiting around an attractive woman at a gym.

Researchers Map Orbit of Men Around Attractive Women at Gyms

DENVER, CO – Scientists at the University of Denver have mapped, for the first time, the orbit of men around an attractive woman at a gym.


Hot, New Restaurant Only Serves Crusts Cut from Children’s Sandwiches

SAN FRANCISCO, CA – The Bay Area’s hottest new restaurant is making a name for itself in both menu and sustainability by offering only crusts cut from local children’s sandwiches.


Non-Existent Marvel Show Featuring Strong Female Lead Getting Bad Reviews

LOS ANGELES, CA – A yet to be announced Marvel Studios Disney + series with a female lead is already getting poor reviews on IMDB.com.


Mike Rapide says he is going to take a break from constantly owning Libs.

Local Man to Take a Break from Owning Libs

PRESCOTT, AZ – A local Republican says he’s getting a bored “constantly owning all the libs” and is considering taking some time off to focus on himself.


Plants can help brighten up a basement bedroom.

Decorators Offer Tips for Decorating Your New Bedroom in Your Parent’s Basement

LOS ANGELES, CA – As thousands of students graduate college and move back in with their parents, redecorating tips for basement living spaces has become a popular social media trend.


Companies are using incentives such as on-site clowns to lure employees back in to the office.

Companies Offering New Incentives to Lure Employees Back to The Office

SAN FRANCISCO, CA – To incentivize reluctant employees to return to the office, companies are offering new in-office only perks like on-site clowns, monthly balloon parties, new glory holes, and free shrimp cocktail.


A group gathered at a local bar was surprised to learn that MTV is still on the air.

Group Shocked to Learn MTV Still on The Air

NEW YORK, NY – A mixed group of Millennials and Gen-Xers were shocked this week to learn that MTV is still on the air and broadcasting new content.


Fox News television personality Tucker Carlson told his viewers to drink bull semen to increase their testosterone.

Tucker Carlson Suggests Drinking Bull Semen to Increase Testosterone

NEW YORK, NY – To combat falling testosterone levels in American, white males, Fox News personality Tucker Carlson recommends drinking bull semen.


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